Creator Stories

Confessions of an occasionally well-fed, occasionally starving comedy writer

By Hans Kracauer

Are you on a quest for the Comedy Pot Of Gold?  So am I.  My name is Hans Kracauer.  I’m a WGA writer currently pursuing my jester’s trade (writer’s division) in Los Angeles.

I come out of advertising.  Specifically – as a (somewhat) acclaimed copywriter in New York.  Although I had always been a writer, I became determined to shift my focus to writing  screenplays.  Or, if need be, to writing  directly for television.  I announced my intention to various colleagues.  The reaction?  I was repeatedly told that (a) I absolutely needed an agent and (b) no self-respecting agent (or even one with zero self-respect)  would touch me unless I had  documented entertainment credits.  Wait a minute, I protested.  What about the fact that I had won numerous prestigious advertising awards? Both for my print ads and for my television commercials?  Wake up and smell the stardust, I was told.  Advertising awards?  You might as well be an award-winning plumber.

Well, it’s no news bulletin that conventional wisdom can be dead wrong.  But at first it didn’t seem that way.  Who cared if I had  already written a feature comedy. In show business, I was a nobody.  Plunking the feature  smack dab in front of a powerful agent was  a sure way not to get it read.  One had to do the deed in stages.  One had to be stealthy.  Therefore I sent out a rather wily pitch letter.  It not only pointed  to  my creative accomplishments in advertising but – as an attachment – included a ten minute comic screenplay I had written for an ad publication.  The screenplay (ultra-broad) centered on the way political correctness had pervaded every corner of the advertising industry.  (Curious? I’m including it here as an attachment.)

Well, you can imagine the aftermath.  My pitch was mostly ignored.  But one major agent did respond.  He read the short.  He then asked to see the feature screenplay.  Next thing I knew, I was being represented by one of the top talent agencies  in Los Angeles.

Did my life suddenly change?  Did everything now come up smelling roses.?  Are you kidding?  Of course not.  The screenplay did not sell.  However, I did wind up with a job writing on a celebrated TV sitcom.  Naturally, the sitcom did not last.  Neither did my agent.  He disappeared under the radar  after losing out in some political power scuffle at the agency.

Hey, it’s Hollywood! I am currently agent-less again. Still there have been compensations.  I can skip down the street with a number of options under my belt.  Plus my prospects are – as everyone intones like a mantra – excellent.

Want to be further enlightened? Visit my screenplay and television web site: WWW.MANICMOONBEAMS.COM.

Good hunting to everyone!

When you see your comedy sketch performed across the Atlantic

To kick off 2017 we set Comedy Crowders a challenge; write a 2 minute sketch about 2 characters from a family in the year 2050.

We also added a twist.

The winning sketch was to be performed live by St Louis based sketch troupe SketchPad Comedy in the US.

Now you can see Adam Martin’s winning sketch being performed. Check it out:

8 tips for performing at the Edinburgh Fringe Festival without losing your shirt..

By Marysia Trembecka – The Singing Psychic

Edinburgh Fringe is still, despite the cost and the competition, the mecca of the comedy world. It’s the largest arts festival in the world where you can test your sketches, comedy character or indeed entire shows on audiences who are wild, free and looking to be entertained. Plus of course there are scouts, bookers, great acts to watch plus it is networking heaven for finding other collaborators for your online work.

So here are some top tips especially written for the Comedy Crowd. I have both failed and ‘won’ in some measure at Edinburgh so this is a voice of experience, my bio is at the bottom of the article.

  1. Apply for the free fringe!

PBH’s Free Fringe was the very first to break the mould of having to pay 1000’s of pounds to have a run at Edinburgh Fringe. (I went with PBH last year and am with them again this year so a disclaimer on loyalty from me is necessary here.)

Costs of doing Edinburgh Fringe include:

  • Securing a venue (this runs into £1000’s for a guarantee even on a one hour slot in a room above a noisy pub).
  • PR costs (£1800 is about the price you expect to pay for decent PR).
  • Accommodation costs in Edinburgh in the month of August, rivals London prices.
  • The Ed Fringe brochure cost: £300 (early deadline March 15th 2017 ) or £400 normal deadline. Even 1-2 performances cost £96 to be in the brochure. If you do pay to get in the brochure, I suggest going to some of the talks that Ed Fringe provide as part of that fee as they have talks on everything from other fringes, to marketing and networking events. They also give great advice in the run up to the brochure on wordings and press lists. I always pay to be in the brochure but many don’t.

Full info here https://www.edfringe.com/participants/registering-your-show

There are other free fringes but start by applying here. http://freefringe.org.uk/

Free Fringe involves being part of a community: you will be asked to help out in a variety of ways including being required to hand out their brochure with all the shows in as well as your own flyer when you flyer and mentioning other free fringe shows when you close. You do get to wave a bucket at the end so practise a money getting speech! I got some pretty decent bucket collections and you feel like a proper troubadour waving cash and coins at the end of each night. PBH Free Fringe also have an amazing brochure and an app so even if you do not want to or can’t afford to pay for the Ed Fringe brochure you will at least be marketed and seen in the PBH brochure and on the app.

  1. Don’t do a full run

Everyone says you cannot get press in without doing a full run, and it is definitely much harder. However the sad truth is that even full run shows will not get the press in, with over 3,200 shows last year at Ed Fringe there are not even enough bloggers to go around. However going up for a week’s run or more in a paid or non paid venue is valuable for trying out the show, getting live audience reactions and seeing what the competition is like (it’s fierce) plus you may meet your next collaborators.

  1. Make videos to promote your shows

I know I am preaching to the converted here on The Comedy Crowd but the effort of making a trailer is well worth it. With so much competition you have to find a way to find your crowd and stand out, a trailer – less than 90 secs- will make a difference. Even 15 secs of you smiling and talking to the camera with one joke will help. In 2016 there were 2,475,143 tickets sold through the box office, that does not include the free fringe and non-ticketed shows. The audience want to find a reason to come see your show.

I had over 100 videos for my The Singing Psychic character online before I went to Ed Fringe last year and I think the most flyering I did was 20 mins a day and I had not paid for PR. I had largely sell–out audiences and booked two extra matinee shows at the end by popular demand as some nights there was no room to squeeze anyone else in. I had taken a show with reviews already there but the fact my bonkers character was backed up by so many videos meant it at least looked like I had not thrown it together on the motorway on the way up (I have actually done that … see next point).

  1. Be good.

Ed Fringe is a boiling pot of brilliant acts that have honed this show and their stage persona for months if not years. In 2016 there were 50,266 performances of 3,269 shows in 294 venues across Edinburgh (official figures.)

My Ed Fringe shows in both 2006 and 2007 were OK but definitely not ready for the Ed Fringe battlefield. In 2016 my Singing Psychic show already had done a previous run at Camden Fringe 2015, Prague Fringe 2016, the Brit awards party and a host of other gigs and the images and marketing were all on brand. People just kept on turning up in droves. Word of mouth really works in Edinburgh. If you are funny or provocative or just good, people will talk about you in bars, on trains and to random strangers they are in the queue with for another show.

If your show is not ready go try it elsewhere first till it is: London previews, Brighton Fringe in May, Camden Fringe in August plus there are amazing local fringes across the country from Leicester to Manchester as well. Or take up a 30 minute version of your best material and share your hour with another act.

  1. Be nice.

The stresses of doing daily shows, trying to get an audience in (the average Ed Fringe audience is said to be about 20 but there are some huge venues and I have watched lots of shows with a small handful of people in), the flyering, rushing from other gigs etc means you can get tired and emotional.

Be extra nice to everyone; other acts, people in front of you in the queue at Boots and especially nice to your venue and their staff. I used to host cabaret nights and whilst doing two full shows a day at Ed Fringe in 2007 certain acts drama-queen behaviour has stayed with me. To the point where I hear their names and I shudder still years on. This business is small, your tantrum will not be forgotten. Next year someone who watched your meltdown may be hosting a show you are desperate to get on (see next point) or indeed producing major comedy TV work.

  1. Do spots on other people’s stages.

There are lots of variety shows from pure stand up shows to cabaret and even magic. You can even go up for a week without a venue, just pre-book some ten minute spots in. Warning though: don’t have all your mini bookings at one venue as if things go wrong for them (shows do get cancelled or moved) you will have paid for accommodation and travel and have no gigs. This happened to a friend of mine last year and we were all trying to find her gigs.

Even if you have a full show, see where you can do a spot on someone else’s show, it is a great way of getting audiences in and getting word of mouth. Practise a very funny five and ten minute set before you go up. With my Singing Psychic show I was doing probably ten spots a week of 5-10 minutes on other people’s stages. Try and book early, there are Ed Fringe Facebook groups that will advertise from April they are looking for acts.

Plus you never know who you meet. I was too late in getting my Singing Psychic gig for a ten minute slot on a certain Ed Fringe variety show last year, but I have had weekly comedy/compering work with a company since directly due to that contact.

  1. Pace yourself.

It is very easy to go drinking every night, especially if you have friends who have come up to see you but your voice will get dry, you will get more irritable and you simply will not be as funny. I have to sing on stage as well so I chose to drink once a week (in the last week that slid somewhat as did my notes…)

Eat well – fried Mars Bars are fun but nutrition makes a huge difference on a long run. Sleep when you can. My last weekend in Edinburgh I had booked extra matinee shows as well as my evening ones and I discovered I can sleep backstage in a wig and false eyelashes just yards away from someone else’s show blaring loudly.

  1. Make the flyer brilliant.

This is where spending a bit of cash on a real graphic artist or indeed spend time doing a photoshoot is the best use of any spare cash. Become a barista in Starbucks for a month if you have to, to afford this. Make sure your flyer looks like your show (I have made that mistake and had people in the flyer who were not on the stage and people get disappointed). If you have any reviews, stars, claims to fame use them all shamelessly, I had reviews as the show had already done a fair few gigs and it had a lot of stars on it plus a brilliant image (not done by me I hasten to add).

[pdf-embedder url=”https://thecomedycrowd.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/02/20160802-EDDY-A3.pdf” title=”20160802 EDDY-A3″]

In 2017 not only am I taking a new version of last year’s show up – The Singing Psychic Game Show but I am also planning a brand new character and you can guarantee that ‘AWARD NOMINATED CREATOR & STAR OF THE SINGING PSYCHIC…’ will be proclaimed loud on the front. (My show was a finalist and nominee for Best Show, Funny Women)

Why listen to me?

I am an actress and cabaret artiste who has done shows from Edinburgh, Montreal, Prague and Brighton fringes and London’s West End. As a straight actress I have been in many films, some such as the multi award-winning Sunday Dinner With The Morgans, were screened in over 30 festivals worldwide and reached the semi-final nominations round for an Academy Award in 2015. I am the yummy mummy in The Vamps ‘Shall We Dance” hit video.

Last year as my SINGING PSYCHIC character I performed to full houses at Edinburgh Fringe 2016, the Brit Awards 2016 Official After-Party at the 02, Cannes Film Festival, Prague Fringe Festival and other sell-out shows in London both before and after Edinburgh.

I have done a few full runs of other shows at Ed Fringe, including in 2007 doing my own solo show plus running C Venues Midnight cabaret – 68 shows in 28 days. In 2016 I took my Singing Psychic show to Edinburgh Fringe and had to book extra shows by popular demand. Many shows were so packed that people were squeezing under the DJ booth and right to the back bar. My show was a nominee for Best Show, Funny Women 2016 and although I only got maybe four press people in I did break even, every review was at least 4 stars and I got radio coverage and more TV coverage plus more gigs when I got back to London.

Online my SONGS OF BREXIT web series ended up with me being in BBC2 and London Live TV and I continue to be interviewed as myself or my character monthly on TV and radio. I have made 4 web series for the character and every one of them has opened some very interesting doors.

My new version THE SINGING PSYCHIC GAME SHOW is monthly at The Phoenix Artist Club in Soho, London. Plus I performed at Vault Festival in Feb 2017.

In 2017 my new show ‘Queen Of The F*cking World’ is being showcased at the Tristan Bates Theatre, Covent Garden April 24th, then previews at the Phoenix in July before premiering in Ed Fringe 2017. I am also taking THE SINGING PSYCHIC GAME SHOW for a run at the Voodoo Rooms, Aug 5-27th 21.30.

Reviews of my solo work:

  • “Completely bonkers in a good way” (London Theatre 1)
  • “A stunning 4 star performance” (Comedy Coroner)
  • “Good vibes that will leave you laughing long after” (Younger Theatre)
  • “Can work a crowd like no other” (Grumpy Gay Critic)
  • “A gloriously entertaining night out” (Female Arts) “Certainly knows how to entertain” (Three Weeks).
  • “No one sings those songs like you do” (Jeff Beck)

Watch her 90 second Singing Psychic trailer video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_l0wKXyQiOg

www.marysiatrembecka.com

www.singingpsychic.tv

Twitter @marysiat @singpsychic

Facebook:/YouTube/Insta The Singing Psychic

How to get into Live Sketch Comedy

By Jason Flamm

At The Comedy Crowd we talk a lot about why comedy creators should get involved in sketch groups, but how should you actually go about it? In this post Jason Flamm, Comedy Crowder and founder of Sketchpad Comedy, responds to that question when asked by a reader.

“Hey I read your article and loved it. Not sure where you are based out of but I am a Chicago comedian and I am trying to get into live sketch comedy. I’m curious if you have any advice. I have done sketch films, stand up, improv but live sketch on stage is new to me and not sure how to get it off the ground.Do you recommend getting a group? A partner? Writing then rehearsing? I’m curious of your process. I have taken a few sketch classes at second city .Stand up is just immediate- you show up at a bar and sign up and then you are ready to go. I’m not sure how to do that with Sketch.

Thanks for reading!

-Chicago Comedian”

Hi Chicago Comedian

Thanks for reaching out and I’m glad you loved my article (to read click here). I’m based out of St. Louis, MO— so, close but oh so far away from Chicago.

I’m not entirely sure how to do it in Chicago, but I can tell you how I did it in St. Louis — it’s probably similar, but I would imagine getting stage time there is a bit harder than it is in STL. But, then again, you probably have more people around you who have similar thinking than I do here.

I started in improv before getting into sketch. Because of that I met some really funny people that I thought would be great to work with. So, what I did was simply reach out to them. I sent out a Facebook message to about 19 people and said “Hey, I’m not exactly sure how I’m going to do this, but I want to put on and perform a live sketch comedy show. If you’re interested I’d love to have you be a part of it with me.” I set up a time and date and about 13 of them showed up. Some even brought other friends of theirs that I didn’t know.

Then, we trained ourselves. Sounds like you already have training so you have a head start of where I was! We got a person (with sketch experience) to give us a 3 hour workshop on the basics of sketch comedy and then we found a space to perform and rehearse. Then, about 2 months later we put up the show to our friends who we all invited.

It was that simple.

I would suggest to you to decide a) do you want to work with other people and if so, about how many? b) Reach out to those specific people. Don’t just do a general post on Social media like “hey I’m starting a sketch team, who’s in?” — It’s very likely that will not get a response. Instead, identify people you think are funny and who you think you’d like to spend time with.

Get those people together in a room and let everyone talk about how great being on a sketch team would be and start to think of concepts for shows.

Once you have those things rolling along, you’ll start to figure out what kind of material to develop.

For example, my first sketch team was in the year 2012. We decided to call our show The Last Sketch Comedy Show on Earth. We were trying to play off the Mayan calendar that said the world would be coming to an end on December 21st, 2012.

Spoiler alert: it didn’t.

Having that focus helped us develop our show. “Okay, so we want to talk about the end of the world. We want to frame things around this big event that’s going to happen.” We made ourselves a Mayan Sun Logo:

Now all of a sudden we had an image (in both the logo and our team), we had an identity to play off of and we had something to build material around.

This doesn’t mean we didn’t have our share of non-world ending related sketches, but it was always a compass to go back to.

Limitations are actually a fantastic thing to give yourself as a creator.

From then, we met every week. We wrote together, pitched sketches to one another, decided on what we wanted to present in that month’s show and then rehearsed. Once show date came we put on a show and had a blast.

So, you’ll also need to reach out to a venue or some kind of space. Maybe you know someone that works at a bar that has a stage and is looking for extra revenue on a Monday or Tuesday night? Maybe you can talk to a space that usually has drag shows and see if they have openings on Wednesday or Thursday night that you could put on a show at their space.

The best places to look are going to be bars that aren’t the busiest. The ones that host trivia or karaoke. Because then you know they are open to outside performers or finding ways to draw in extra revenue.

Or find a friend with a big open basement or some abandoned warehouse (our show was performed in a dead part of town at a coffeehouse that barely did any business. It shut down on us, so we had to move. But, then we talked the owner of the building into letting us do our final show there on December 21st. Basically we squatted. haha. It was awesome and we packed the place each show — we were the only sketch show in town, afterall.)

If you have trouble finding a space, get creative. Perform in someone’s big living room. Get a 2 AM show together somewhere. Whatever, it doesn’t matter. The point is getting on stage and gaining that experience… and having fun doing so.

While you find a space, write together. Go to sketch shows together and talk with your group about what you guys liked, didn’t like and what you want to steal (and by steal I mean concepts or ideas, not material. Read Austin Kleon if you have an objection to “stealing.”). Learn what makes each other laugh. Write to your strengths and just do the work.

Also — I know there are tons of people in Chicago doing sketch (they have the largest Sketch Festival in the country going on right now). You probably have someone that you’ve taken a class with or go/went to school with that’s done it before or is super into it. Reach out. Ask for advice from them or even if they’d want to join/teach you guys some stuff.

I’m also down for traveling and workshops — if that’s something you’re interested in. I go to Chicago about 6 times a year for shows and because my girlfriends’ parents live an hour away in Indiana.

The possibilities are definitely there for you!

Thanks again for reaching out — I hope this info was useful!

Best,

Jason

Sketchpad Comedy

PS — oh, also, don’t stop doing all those other things — they will help your live shows and vice versa. Keep up the work man!


This article originated as an email. It was adapted for public posting purposes. All permissions were given.

Jason runs Sketchpad comedy in St. Louis.  He also blogs regularly about comedy creating here.

The Newsjack Addict goes to a Newsjack Writers Briefing

By Simon Paul Miller

The first bit of advice I can pass on is, if you ever get an invite to a Newsjack Writers’ Briefing, accept it immediately! I responded a day later and got put on a waiting list because the session was already fully booked. Fortunately, I got a seat at the quickly arranged second session on the same night. (For those that don’t know, Newsjack is a topical comedy broadcast on Radio 4 Extra that anyone can write for. See the Newsjack website for details on how to submit material, but you should also read Confessions of a Newsjack Addict so you know what you’re letting yourself in for.)

The producer, Adnan Ahmed, along with Abby Kumar, Co-producer, hosted the Writers’ briefing and both did a terrific job. Jenny Laville and Robin Morgan, who were both awarded the 2016 BBC Radio Comedy Writer’s Bursary, gave us a quick overview of how they got into writing for Newsjack and how it helped them into their present roles at the BBC.

Angela Barnes, the new Newsjack host, was there too and explained how she herself was both a writer and a performer. Angela came over as very empathic and encouraging throughout the evening. The whole atmosphere was professional, but in a very warm and friendly way, for which the team should be applauded.

I could go on an on about how good the evening was, but these blogs are supposed to be brief, so here are my notes from the evening. Hope you find them useful…

So What’s Changing in Series 16?

The big news is that the Viewsjack section has been replaced by a ‘Number Crunching’ section. Apparently there were not enough Viewsjack items being submitted. Here’s an example of one of a number of Number Crunchers that were written and performed on the evening by Jenny and Robin…

“24. Hours the tube lines were closed due to industrial action.

58 million. The number of people who don’t live in London and couldn’t care less.”

So the syntax for these gags, for those who like this sort of thing, is as follows…

<Number> <explanation of number> <number> <punchline>.

Ideally, these one-liners should be topical. As in the last series, you have a limit of six one liners each week, no more than three for each of the two categories (Breaking News and the new Number Crunchers).

However, for sketches, the short commercial sketch is being dropped. It’s just two sketches you can send in each week now and keep them short (if you get to page three, it’s a long sketch). Don’t just use front page stories, they like to have a wide variety of news stories in the show. As a general rule, you should try to use stories that were in the news on/after the Friday before the show goes out. Think about what you are trying to communicate so that the message and/or target of the sketch are clear.

All sketches submitted need an introduction which should be written in the ‘voice’ of the new host, Angela Barnes. To get an idea of her voice, check out her appearance in The News Quiz (Fri 6th Jan) and clips on You Tube. She want’s self-depreciating stuff, which I’m going to find hard to write because she was so nice to us!

Useful Tips & Advice

Newsjack would like to be politically neutral but a lot of sketches/one-liners have a left wing or Remain bias. Submitting a good one-liner/sketch that takes a swipe at the left-wing or Remainers should increase your chances of getting something on the show.

Avoid anti-climatic endings. Sketches should end with a punch. A recommended technique is to think of a good ending first and then write towards that ending.

In answering the question, ‘How long is a one liner?’ Angela said, ‘Basically, if you’ve got a long setup for a joke, it had better be a bl**dy good joke.’

If you can get to the recordings, do. If your stuff doesn’t make it into the final show, it’s the only chance you’ll get to hear your material being performed. And getting your material recorded is a great achievement; don’t be discouraged if it doesn’t get into the final recording.

As with Nish Kumar, Angela will write her own monologue at the start of the show.

A sketch can be really short. For example, if it’s only three lines with one gag, if it’s a good enough gag, they’ll use it. But if that sketch could be a one-liner, it should be a one-liner.

Of the six categories in the show, Arts & Entertainment; Business & Economy; Politics; Science & Technology; Sport; World News, Sport is still the one that receives the least submissions. The team would love to receive more Sports related material and they hope the new one-liners Number Crunching category will encourage this.

There are two men and two women in every show. If you can use them (in a valuable way) to improve your sketch, it will make your sketch more attractive over it’s competition.

With radio, there are no sets to build, so you can set your sketch anywhere. (Another way to look at this that I’ve picked up elsewhere is, if you have written a sketch that’s an interview in a studio, ask yourself, ‘Isn’t there a more imaginative way to do this?’)

Edit your material. Don’t be precious over your stuff. Chuck out unnecessary/weak words/lines, leaving in as much strong stuff as you can.

Don’t worry about using famous people. If it’s funny enough, the crew will figure out how to get it done.

Any topical news story is viable, including local news. The team are looking for the funniest ideas/jokes you can pin on anything with a current news story, big or small.

Follow Newsjack on Twitter (Twitter handle: @NewsjackBBC). During the series they’ll be tweeting cast information and other useful tips that may help you improve your chances of getting something accepted.

My lasting impression of the evening is that Newsjack is in very capable hands and, more than writing for it, I’m really looking forwards to listening to this forthcoming series.

Simon Paul Miller writes (and performs in) The Rhyming Detective podcast.

The 16th series of Newsjack starts on BBC Radio 4 Extra, Thurs. 26th Jan 10:30pm.

I’m an A+E Doctor… and a comedy writer

by Jon Baker (@thecomicaldoc)

I’ve not made it yet by a long shot but I have now made something! It feels good. I’ve learned an incredible amount doing it…and the thing is …one thing leads to another in this writing business. It’s like a long chain of events!

I’ll come back to what I made in a minute. (Okay if you can’t wait, it’s an audio sitcom pilot, a podcast, it’s called Finchley Fitness, it’s set in a gym. The Office meets The Brittas Empire. You can find it here at www.finchleyfitness.com and it stars some really cool young comedians, it’s not perfect by a long shot, could do with another edit, but I’m very proud of it. As I write it’s had some lovely feedback on social media and more listens than I could have imagined. I’ve had messages from as far as Australia from listeners wanting to tell me they really enjoyed it. Sorry, networking, promoting, sneaked that in, lesson one don’t be afraid to talk about yourself, talk yourself up!

Where was I. Yes back a few years. I actually do have a day job. I’m an A&E Doctor. I’ve always wanted to write but if I’m honest wasn’t brave enough to follow that career to start with. I’ve been working as a doctor for some time, it’s fairly full on and I’m pretty busy with it. The beauty of writing though is you can squeeze it in. I write little but often.  I used to lug a laptop around, now I write everything on my iPad on final draft. Means I can grab lots of moments, lots of writing, any time, anywhere. I’ve got five radio sitcoms in the drawer. A few afternoon dramas. And numerous other bits and pieces at ideas stage. I write fast. And I wrote a lot. It feels like an addiction. And crucially I’ve now made a fair few contacts.

I’ve focussed on Radio as that seemed a good learning ground and a good way in. And of course hugely important and successful in its own right, with way more listeners than many TV shows. My break in terms of making contacts came when a guy offering script advice read my work.  I ran a few scripts through him, paid work. He was a commissioned writer and he liked what I’d written. He put me in touch with a script editor in BBC radio. I worked on a few ideas with him. He moved on and left me with a producer his then boss, who made Claire in the Community at the time.  We offered a script to what’s called the PDG at the BBC. It was a hospital based sitcom. It didn’t get through, but of the group of producers who read it, half were really positive, and half hated it. Lesson two- comedy is subjective. I’ve sent scripts to one producer in Radio who’s said ‘no way, don’t get it’. Another one, same script, loved it and offered it to Radio Four for me. Don’t get easily put off, have faith in your work!

I should explain more about the BBC process. The PDG audition scripts each month to choose what then gets offered annually to Radio Four. So step one find a producer, step two they need to like your script, step two the PDG need to like your script. And then step three the commissioner needs to like it. I’ve been stuck at all levels over the years. It’s a bit like snakes and ladders. And I think that leads me to lesson three, resilience. I’ve heard that offered as advice a few times. I think it’s so true, you have to be resilient and stick with it.. Sometimes my day job seems like a god damn pain. All I want to be doing is writing! But honestly the other stuff you do, what ever it is, it feeds your writing. You need something to write about. I confess I use being a doctor to open doors if I can. I think you have to use everything in your tool box. What am I doing currently? Well I’ve  got ideas with a several different producers, in Radio and TV. Some on spec, some contacts I’ve made all from that one original contact. I now spend maybe ten percent of my time making contacts, researching contacts, emailing contacts and ninety percent writing. You do need to do both. And lastly I decided whilst I’m waiting for that first commission that I’d make my own comedy pilot. Hard work, but very rewarding and very insightful.

Ha, I’ve run out of words, I feel blog post part two coming, in which I can give you the low down of how I made this. Maybe have a listen and then we can talk again. Lesson four. Always leave them wanting more!

To get a weekly round-up of comedy insights and opportunities, including creator stories like Jon’s – sign up to our weekly newsletter by entering your email below:


Beginning Together

By Making Faces – Sketch Comedy Troupe

“No man is an island.”

So begins John Donne’s poem and concludes Hugh Grant in About a Boy. That’s why sketch writing is the highest form of comedy.

Not many people will tell you that – least of all ‘umble sketch comedy troupes like us. But it’s true.

In fact, you might look at people like Michael McIntyre and think he’s the definitive one-man show – a singular genius – but it’s a well-known fact that he has writers who work with him who are credited as “programme associate” to keep up the myth of lone genius. [LINK TO: http://www.independent.co.uk/arts-entertainment/comedy/news/stewart-lee-accuses-high-profile-comedians-michael-mcintrye-jack-whitehall-and-frankie-boyle-of-8718101.html]

You can understand why solo stand-ups want to create the illusion that all their jokes are their own, but if you look at the history of comedy, all the best stuff was written by teams.

Making Faces Sketch Comedy Troupe began as three soloists, Dan Curtis (stand-up), Lizzie Kevan (musical comedy) and Ed Mayhew (puns and poems). We saw each other at a Summer Festival and decided to team up.

Our initiation was a high-octane roller coaster which went against all advice we have subsequently discovered. We were together for just one week of writing and performed just one preview show together before we took a 17-show run to the Edinburgh Fringe in 2010. The show, (called Making Faces before that was the group’s name), mixed our solo pieces and featured our first sketches together.

No surprise, the sketches were what the audience enjoyed the most – so that’s what we kept doing.

Since then we’ve been to Fringe Festivals in Edinburgh (Laughing Horse), Brighton (Otherplace Productions) and Camden (Etcetera Theatre), each providing their own benefits and costs, but all recommended.

Following in the footsteps of one of the top sketch groups in the country, Pappy’s, we started a monthly comedy night, called FACELIFT. This was a great opportunity to get to know acts that we really love, as well as trying our sketches out. We were really lucky to have groups like Pappy’s, Two Episodes of Mash, Jigsaw, The Pin and Tim Vine at our early shows.

Hosting a night requires a lot of time and energy but it is a great way to gain experience and meet people. We’re excited that people still want to come to FACELIFT as many new comedy nights don’t get off the ground.

By far the best thing for us as a group has been writing, improvising and trying out ideas together.

There is a Biblical proverb: “As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another.” And we’ve found that to be true. When Ben Elton and Richard Curtis were writing Blackadder, they had the rule that if their line was removed by the other writer, it was never put back. The result: the sharpest comedic writing.

While we can’t claim to be in that hall of fame (yet/ever) we’ve found that when we write together the standard of our work is so much higher because it receives immediate feedback. When we perform together, we bring differing insights into why a joke hit or missed.

In comedy, there is simply no substitute for the immediate feedback of laughter from a viewer – as a stand-up, you can rehearse 100 times in a mirror, but the moment you share your work with an audience, that’s when you’ll really get the feedback you need. In a sketch group, you get feedback much more quickly. And that, my friends, is why sketch comedy is the highest art form available to humankind.

So, if you’re starting out in comedy, or in any arts industry, do not expect to be a genius on your own. The Artist (with a capital A) didn’t exist, even during the Renaissance, and it simply can’t exist today.

As John Donne may have written if he were alive in 2016:

“No man is an island entire of itself; every man 

is a piece of the continent, a part of the main.

I probably shouldn’t have voted for Brexit … innit.”

Watch Making Faces – Sketches at Leicester Square Theatre, 21-22 November, £5, 7pm

https://leicestersquaretheatre.ticketsolve.com/shows/873560021/events

To see a comedy video of Making Faces discussing the Myth of Genius click here:

Myth of Genius – Professor Wilmots Phymer
https://vimeo.com/175510774


 

How I got to sort of write for TV…

By Stefan Gibbons-Arif

I have written words that people (sometimes comedians, sometimes puppets) have said on TV and Radio and for the most part got paid for it, but I’m not really a professional fancy pants writer.

I work as a freelance Assistant Producer in comedy television and Children’s comedy. Fortunately, I’ve been able to write one-liners, sometimes two-liners and even full scripts, but trying to just be a TV writer, nothing else, is pretty ruddy difficult.

I just want to share my experience so far for people who want to write comedy for television. There are many different routes and stories out there, but here is my one if you’re curious.

I started off working in television by hearing from a friend of a friend that a BBC show needed a runner. ‘The 5:19 Show’ was part of BBC Switch, catering for the early teenage audience but the department was cut because teenagers don’t exist anymore or summat.

As a runner, I did whatever I was asked, which sometimes meant making terrible budget props from materials in the prop cupboard and at other times dressing up as a tree and having satsumas thrown at me by a cast member of the movie Twilight slash dressing up as Guy Fawkes and having bread rolls thrown at me by the American band “3OH!3”.
Runner jobs can solely involve making tea and getting people lunch, but I lucked out on this one. Also, at one point the presenter who was a professional comedian said I was funny and it was the highlight of my career and LIFE at the time.

About 3 months down the line, the Producer of the 5:19 show suggested me to another Producer friend for a junior researcher role at ‘Russell Howard’s Good News’. The interview went well and that’s where I stayed working for about 6 series.

I don’t want to downplay my role on the show too much but I essentially watched the news all day (BBC local news, ITV news, Sky rolling news) looking out for anything that could be funny, and as I clambered up to the role of Associate Producer, I led an editorial team who also did the same. We became an absolute machine, churning through hours and hours of news footage to find the best bits. We worked 6 days a week and ate takeaways most nights and as a younger person, it was ace, but I couldn’t do it now. I like to be home for at least the C4+1 showing of the Simpsons and cook a lamb tagine. Also, I met my wife working on RHGN so in some ways it was my best job ever.

Working on a comedy show, you’ll inevitably work with funny people, sometimes annoying people, sometimes a combination, and sometimes scary people…anyway, the main thing is, you’ll work with funny people.

I learnt the craft of topical joke writing over the course of my time at Russell Howard’s Good News even though I wasn’t writing anything.
Once I suggested a joke in a meeting and it got made into a sketch, and I was in the sketch dressed as a fairy and it was the highlight of my career and LIFE at the time.
Obviously suggesting a joke to a comedian and writers is pretty nerve wracking and you should stick to your role in the team, so don’t do that kind of thing straight away, definitely build a rapport with everyone and be nice and not an arse and do your actual job.

Anyway, once I left the series, I was employed as an external gag writer for one series but didn’t get any jokes in the show. That was a bit of a kick in the teeth.

After I fixed my teeth, I worked on half a series of ‘Mock The Week’ as an Associate Producer and contributed jokes to the show and theeeeeen I worked on ‘The Last Leg’ on Channel 4, and contributed some jokes there.

This was all building up my confidence, knowing that I could write jokes that could make broadcast on different shows, so that led me to sending jokes into BBC Radio 4 Extra’s Newsjack and getting an actual writing credit and some money. I also got a sketch onto Radio 4’s ‘Show What You Wrote’ so do look out for those sorts of opportunities open to everyone.

Then I moved to Manchester because London got too expensive in general which I marked by how much the price of a coffee was going up each week…and house prices.

I managed to get a job casting for a CBeebies show called ‘Spot Bots’, which I then wrote some scripts for and got an actual TV writing credit. The show, however, is silent comedy for pre-schoolers, so I just had to write things like ‘The fairy fell over’. Though thinking about it that was probably my first official TV writing credit.
I don’t think I promised you a success story, just a story.
I just realised that I’ve mentioned fairies again…maybe fairies will continue to pop up in seminal writing moments in my life.

Via contacts I had made in London, I managed to get a meeting with an executive producer at BBC Comedy in Salford and worked there for 9 months as an Assistant Producer, reading scripts and making a few pilots.
This is where I learnt a lot about the BBC Comedy commissioning process and read a lot of comedy scripts…that probably warrants another blog.

After the 9 months, I went over to CBBC to work as an Assistant Producer but specifically a writing Assistant Producer on ‘Sam and Mark’s Big Friday Wind-Up’, which I’d describe as ‘Ant and Dec’s Saturday Night Takeaway’ but with Sam and Mark and on a Friday. I essentially wrote a lot of funny links and it was grand because I actually felt I was being paid to write, but sadly not getting an actual ‘writer’ credit for some reason.

THEN, we get to my latest and best role on CBBC’s ‘Hacker Time’ (Sort of like a British version of ‘The Muppets’).

Here, I got to write full scripts, sketches, songs and even a mini-mockumentary series. Again, I was a ‘Writing Assistant Producer’ but still not credited as a writer, which was crazy because I wrote half the series. Maybe I just need to be content that I’m getting paid to write bits for TV and not worry about the credit.

I think this has been therapeutic for me.

I don’t know if there is any real advice I can give for aspiring comedy writers. Reflecting on my story, maybe if you want to write for comedy television, try working in comedy television? That way you’ll meet the right people and be in the right industry.

Oh and another thing I kept learning is not to underestimate writing for radio. The BBC, for example, has a lot of comedy hours to fill on radio and it means the writing has to be top notch. Shows such as Miranda, Flight of the Conchords and The Mighty Boosh started off as radio shows and then got made for TV, not that TV is the pinnacle anymore.

Anyway, I’m off to write a radio play about fairies.

BYEEEEEEEEEEEEE

One Location, One weekend

By Shem Pennant of Amelia Comedy

Wanna make a webseries? We did and had a blast doing it. 2 Standup Comedians Living in a Flat is an 8 episode web series about exactly what you think it is. We made it all in one location, with a skeleton crew and minimal budget and thought we’d share a few tips with the Comedy Crowd. Ideally so you’ll watch it and tell us if you get the R Kelly joke, but also because we went from a blank page to finished show in 7 days and feel we learnt a few useful things from the many, many mistakes we made over the process.

Research

There’s an Italian expression “everything shapes good taste” and we watched a bunch of shows to work out what we loved and just as importantly, what we didn’t respond to. The Comedy Crowd’s forums are filled with people sharing their work and it’s useful to watch what people are doing for inspiration. Having a critical eye and self awareness of your collective taste is super useful when you’re creating and at the very least you’ll make something that’s funny for you. One of our key inspirations was the PFFR produced sitcom Delocated. Check it out.

Writing 

Writers write! Ideas don’t mean anything in your head so get them on the page. If you’re reading this you probably have at least three viable ones. So write it down! Too many people talk about what they’re writing and never go through the process of putting pen to paper. Writer’s block is more of a myth than the world of Entourage.  We locked the writer in a hot room in Cairo with no access to the Internet for 24 hours and forced him to polish off the scripts. You probably shouldn’t do that. But having a really hard deadline to produce *something*, is super helpful as you can really surprise yourself under pressure. And it gives something solid for you to bounce off with the rest of the team – or for your online peers.

Improv

Improv … yuk! But wait. Come back.Improv is more than just riffing lines on set – although that can be very useful. We all studied improv and sketch at the Upright Citizens Brigade Theatre in New York and one of the central principles they impart to students is “if this unusual thing is true, what *else* is true”. UCB-style improv is super useful for writing as you train yourself to really unpack ideas, and surprise yourself (and hopefully your audience). It’s also really good as you learn how to find interesting, relatable premises in real life and discover the various beats. The UCB Comedy Improvisation Manual is a great guide to the basics. And it’s easy to find some collaborators, pitch premises and use improv guidelines to really unpack the various beats that your idea presents. But just because you can improvise a fun scene in the moment, still put in the work to write, enhance and edit your material.

Limitations

Amelia’s old improv teacher Michael Delaney used to say “discipline is freedom”. Having strict limits imposed forces you to make hard choices and work with what you have. One of Amelia was about to leave the country for the rest of the year, so we only had a few days in which to shoot. We also had spent a fortune on improv classes, so had no actual money for budget, lights, locations etc. So we used what we had. The kitchen was the brightest room in the house so that because the focal point for most episodes (Puns, Shower and the Have You Ever Noticeboard). Once we decided that everything would be set in the flat, we thought it would be fun to centre an episode around them trying to leave (WillLyns) and trying to be noticed from the flat (Agents).

Shooting 

We’re very lucky that we have access to an ok camera, but you can do a lot with a smartphone, good light and attention to sound. And if you have a little money you can rent a great camera for a day or two. None of us are talented DOPs so we made a tonne of mistakes and had to redo a whole episode – you can see the painful puppet edit on the Shower episode. Good light is essential. Capture a tonne of coverage so you can edit around shots. Do multiple takes. Really ensure that you have nice clear sound. And when you hit the edit booth be ruthless.

Apps are also your friend. And apologies in advance that all these are on iOS, we’re sure there are Android equivalents. We wrote outlines in distraction free editing software IA Writer, and the full scripts in the iPad version of Final Draft, which is so much cheaper than the desktop version it’s silly. And there’s a free Final Draft Reader app so you can share with your team easily. On set the Light Meter app was super useful for making sure everything was properly exposed, and that we could have consistent look across shots. We forgot to use it sometimes and kicked ourselves. Filmic Pro is a much lauded camera app that gives you granular control over exposure, ISO and white balance. Sound is super important and iRig Mic Lav is a super cheap way of gaining access to Lav mics. We popped them on Will and Lyns, slipped a smartphone in one of their pockets and synced everything up in the edit later. And we used iMaschine and Garageband to compose the theme song and incidental music, as it’s quick to sketch out a jaunty ditty (WillLyns) or a dope trap beat (Queefy Keefy’s theme).

We edited in Final Cut Pro X which, whilst not as loved as Premiere, is pretty cheap. Our one expense was on the Colour Finale plugin for grading – you can get a free trial but we loved it so much we really wanted to reward the developer with money.

Do it just to do it and then do it again 

We made the show just to see if we could. And that was all. We’ve shared it a couple of places, some people have liked it, some people have *hated* it and most people haven’t watched it. And that’s fine. It’s very unlikely that Lorne Michaels is going to be on the phone asking you to host SNL tomorrow, but it is satisfying to have made something. And once you’ve done that … go make something else.

You can check out the ‘2 Stand-up Comedians’ web series by clicking here. And to see more from Amelia Comedy head to their YouTube and Facebook Pages.

To make sure you stay up to date with the latest opportunities and insights in the world of comedy, join thousands of creators and fans receiving our free weekly newsletter, plus when you subscribe you’ll get our e-book – Getting started and making an impact in comedy:

Call me Derren – A first attempt at stand up comedy

By Adam Martin

The only lengthy thing I’ve ever been proud of owning is my list of heroes. The list is exclusively funny people and since I became aware of them I’ve wanted to join them. So over the last year and a bit I’ve been trying stand up comedy after decades of putting it off. The first attempt took place – as good things do – in the small room of a pub.

You can’t fit more than about 15 people in and even that would mean unsolicited elbow rubbing, spilt drambuie and everyone having to breath in to let someone out for a wee. The small room in the King’s Arms is an intimate setting for a comedy cherry pop, and with an evening titled “The worst comedy night in Salford” I was feeling surprisingly calm when we sat down.

The “worst night” is more relaxed than a old shaggy dog who’s found a good sunspot and so when my name was called – no need to book, just turn up – I took my notes and ploughed into my, hopefully, five minutes of material. My goal was to get at least one solid laugh that I knew I’d earned and anything beyond that was a bonus. One laugh for all the marbles.

I got the solid laugh I wanted and I didn’t spontaneously combust or anything. I was overwhelmingly relieved but a little disappointed that the trains were still running and the riot police weren’t on the streets to keep back my new fans.

I would tell you how it went but you can see the results for yourself below. What’s most important to me about that first try is that it was exactly that, my first try. The first hurdle jumped with a beard related barb. The journey of a thousand seat theatre begins with a single quip.

‘Anyone can write…the hard part is being prepared to be judged on your writing’

Do you want to turn your passion for comedy into a career? Lee Dilley and Paul Farrell started writing together after meeting at university and have worked on a range of comedy projects alongside their day jobs. Now they have co-founded their own production company, Goat Tree Films, and have been privately commissioned to write, produce and direct sitcom pilot ‘In The Dog House’, which premieres on Tuesday 23rd August.

Their journey is one that many Comedy Crowders will relate and aspire to, so we caught up with them to ask about their experience so far.  Their responses contain some great insights about how they write together, what they’ve learned about creating real characters, and why they’re always working on multiple projects.

How did you get into comedy writing?

LD: ‘Very slowly but naturally, like putting on an old pair of slippers. I say naturally, but not easily; first you have to wear the slippers in. From watching comedy such as the Two Ronnies, Morecambe and Wise, Porridge, Black Adder, The Office, Inbetweeners, Fawlty Towers and of course Only Fools And Horses all my life, the next natural step was to imitate them in some shape or form. I was never any good at writing because of my dyslexia, so telling comedy stories verbally was my high. I tried writing but my confidence and inexperience hindered me, I even posted some early work off but I never even got a reply unless it was a bounce back. It’s the equivalent of messaging everyone on a dating app and the only reply is the dating app recommending a different app. At the start the writing isn’t the hard part at all – anyone can write. The hard part is being prepared to be judged on your writing, that’s the real art. Once you shake that bit off you will have the confidence to paint your personality into every word and then the words will start to feel real and breathe. I say this now but I couldn’t call myself a writer until I met my writing partner, Paul during my time at University. He also had a quietened voice, but really wanted to scream about comedy, a love for stories, great dialogue and character arcs. More than that, Paul had something I missed completely, “structure”; if story is King it’s nothing without its Queen of structure. Nail the structure and worst case scenario you’ll still end up with a standing house, 2 out of 3 pigs get this wrong.’

PF: ‘By being that pig for a long time. I’ve always aimlessly written since I was a child without ever realising that it could become a career (that’s still debatable), so once that clicked I went to University and met Lee. Basically, I paid 20 grand to meet my writing partner. I grew up wearing out VHS copies of Only Fools and Horses so comedy is engrained in my writing.’

Tell us about the first comedy script you wrote?

 LD: ‘It was Jobseekers #jobseekerssitcom inspired by the credit crunch and high unemployment rates, we [myself & Paul] didn’t just write it, we made it. I sold my only car, my precious classic Mini to fund the project and what money we had from our dwindling student loans (don’t worry, we’re never paying it back at this rate) we then premiered the pilot at Derby Quad Cinema and BAFTA and we were then signed to a UK Top 100 production company. Since then Jobseekers made it to commissioners’ tables from BBC CH4, ITV and more. Jobseekers unfortunately never got picked up but we had some very interesting feedback and about 50 re-writes during the 2 year pitching process.’

PF: ‘With Jobseekers it really was a crash course for us as new writers, you don’t exactly expect your first script to hit the desks of the major channels but it did (and it’s still sitting on a few). What we learnt was to not get to caught up in one project; you should have a catalogue of scripts and pitches on the go at any one time.’

How did your comedy journey progress?

LD: ‘Stories are about unravelling. Think of a knot in a ball of string, well the character has to find a way to that knot, sometimes making others but eventually they learn the way and all is undone again. The writing process is the same, you have to find your knots, what bugs you, what gets you out of bed in the morning or what stops you going to sleep at night. Find that knot then create a character and set them out to find it, the truth, the answer or question. As you might notice I enjoy a metaphor but I suppose put simply, the journey is one of truth, you have to be truly honest about yourself and why you do things as a character, you might not like what you see but eventually you realise they are natural reactions even if they are selfish, inconsiderate, rude, hurtful etc.. Nobody is perfect which means no character is either and that ‘false knot’ will stand out like a leather jacket at a vegan fair. Be honest it’s human, we have all these emotions for a reason, it’s normal, what isn’t normal is trying to hide it.’

PF: ‘It’s constant evolution. New found knowledge will destroy everything you have ever written but for the better. So the learning journey of the craft is a bumpy one, but the most rewarding. Even though we are only just on the road ourselves, we have written scripts in a variety of formats now from features to stand up. Each having their distinct hidden rules and boundaries to find that you can’t see without launching yourself feet first with eyes open. We are currently working on our latest feature film script called ‘UFHoax’ with all fingers and toes crossed this one will break free of the page.’

You’ve worked in roles as varied as a croupier and a nursery play worker – how important is life experience to being a good writer?

LD: ‘Very important if you want to write about a nocturnal croupier who works as a play worker in the day. Seriously though, I’d say extremely important – I’ve probably had 50 different jobs in my day but it isn’t particularly the job it’s who is doing them and why? People, it’s all about the people. Everyone has a story and experience is listening to and living through other people’s stories.’

PF: ‘Dead end jobs? Truthfully, it adds a grit and determination and a good fear of taking a backwards step if you don’t take an opportunity that appears.’

What would you advise someone who wants to write but doesn’t have a diverse range of life experience?

LD: ‘I’d say go get some! That’s exactly what I told myself at 21, and I went and worked on cruise ships and travelled to 5 continents and 45+ countries to find stories and create my own. Before travelling I created false knots in my stories, stories with part truths, too exaggerated, paper thin characters.’

PF: ‘You’ll write nothing feeling numb, so go out there and feel, good and bad. Also be fully aware that writing is a bizarrely twisted profession. You sit in a dark room in complete and utter self-isolation dreaming up human interactions. So it’s probably best to go out there and learn and experience what you’re going to spend your life banging on about.’

Tell us about your writing process?

LD: ‘So random we could never get assassinated, as a writing duo we meet whenever we can, after work, weekends, on the phone, in the pub before 2 pints. Unfortunately routine can only happen with paid work, and as writers you work for love and then you get money when other people fall in love with your work, which isn’t an easy achievement. I think as a duo it’s best to get the structure, chat about possible problems, outline the characters then go off individually to write jokes and dialogue, then pitch it the other writer as the character. Writing by myself I find 2am is the best time for me, I need absolute quiet, no TV, no phone and no next doors lawnmower. I do write in the morning sometimes but I hit walls quicker, walls not blokes, although it can mean the same thing. Your character might have taken a wrong turn and hit a wall, a bloke means you wrote the wrong character and he can’t get over the wall ‘end of story’. A wall means you need to have a break, usually a shower and find the way your character would try and get over the wall (obstetrical).’

PF: ‘Late Dinner. Gossiping like old women on a bus. Snack break. One great idea. That will do for today.’

How important is it to have a writing partner?

LD: ‘For British comedy it’s usually a duo, although John Sullivan wrote Only Fools And Horses on his own but he’s a comedy genius and an exception to the rule. I imagine it’s very difficult to find a writing partner with the exact same sense of humour, resilience, enthusiasm, goals and most importantly honesty. As a writing duo we lie down like therapy and confess our failures, needs, wants and could never gets.’

PF: ‘Its main benefit is having an audience member with you at all points so your ideas are always being challenged and questioned. ‘Why’ is our favourite word as you have to challenge every single word in a script. We usually find if one of us really fights for an idea it usually means they’re right.’

Tell us about Goat Tree Films

LD: ‘The name is all about how we as a couple of working class blokes look odd as writers, and so does a goat in a tree. However it seems to work somehow, and bonus, it’s funny to look at. Our mantra is we believe a great story promotes change. We also promote women in media, which brings us onto the next question nicely, that’s another thing about writing… plan ahead.’

PF: ‘We’ve always felt slightly like the out crowd, a couple of unfashionable filmmakers who don’t go home and watch a 1921 film from Botswana. We watch Jurassic Park. So Goat Tree felt perfectly awkward for us. Plus we also don’t have very catchy names.’

Tell us about your current project, ‘In the Dog House’?

PF: ‘ In The Dog House is a sitcom pilot inspired by the books of Sid Jenkins, who has devoted over 50 years of his life to animal welfare. It follows a group of naive kennel workers who go rogue to solve animal related crimes.

Finally, what advice would your current self give to your past-self at the point you started on your writing journey?

LD: ‘I would probably say nothing, because the truth would be, you’re not going to make it this year or the next, or the next and it’s going to cost you a lot of money and time. Sometimes it’s better not to warn yourself of the end goal because you won’t enjoy the ride. Or I’d say, structure, get the structure write you stupid prick do you realise how much we’ve had to write around your problems, move scenes, delete scenes, erase characters, days and weeks wasted.’

PF: ‘Those that talk the talk, rarely walk the walk.’

Tickets to the premiere of Lee and Paul’s latest comedy In The Dog House can be bought here .

Want to turn your comedy passion into something more? Here at The Comedy Crowd we are building a community that works together to create great comedy.  Subscribe to our weekly newsletter for the latest opportunities, advice and tools to create comedy:


Confessions of a Newsjack Addict

By Simon Paul Miller

My name is Simon Paul Miller and I’m an addict. The 12th September 2013 was the day I got addicted. Before that, I just dabbled. I started by submitting a couple of one-liners, it seemed harmless enough, but then I moved on to the harder stuff, sketches. I thought I could handle it, but I was wrong. I crave the next high I’ll get when an email will pop into my inbox telling me I have something in that night’s edition of Newsjack.

NewsjackLogoI can try to remember the first time it happened, but it’s not like a normal memory. It’s like a memory of a dream. The email was vague in detail as, by necessity, it was the same email sent out to all the writers who’d managed to get something in. Once I’d recovered from the shock, and my family had recovered from my reaction, I was left with the thought… What was it they were going to use? Was it the sketch I’d sent in or one of my one-liners, or maybe more than one, or maybe a sketch and some one liners!

Normally, I’d listen Newsjack as a downloaded podcast over the weekend, but I had to know. Over the next five and a bit hours, I pondered over and over as to which material had made it. My heart pounded, my head buzzed and I only had a vague sense the real world was still around me. At about 10:20 I tuned our TV into Radio 4 Extra. I’d never listened to the radio on TV before. It’s very strange watching a radio show. It feels pointless looking at the screen but also odd not to.

The programme on before Newsjack consisted of two people shouting at each other. They appeared to think they were funny, I couldn’t tell. Eventually that programme ended. It was 10:30. The announcer wittered on and on and on and on, for thirty three seconds, before the Newsjack theme finally started. There was no monologue then, Justin Richards launched into one-liners sent in and I didn’t have long to wait. The third joke was mine…

“The Sunday Times has revealed that residents of Coleshill in North Warwickshire have the highest rate of Viagra prescriptions in the country. No one from the town was available for comment.”

And the audience roared. Wow! Fantastic! I loved it. I devoured it. Then listened to the rest of the show in what proved to be a vain hope that something else I’d submitted had been accepted. And then they read out the names of people who’d written the stuff on the show. I knew they did that, but I hadn’t thought about it. Any second now, my name was going to be read out.

But it wasn’t. I was confused. I tried to figure out why. Maybe they only included people who’d written sketches, but there were many more names than sketches. Maybe they didn’t include people who’d only had one one liner on the show. It didn’t matter. My joke had been told on the radio. It took a long time to get to sleep that night.

The next day I found out, on Twitter, that an error had been made and, as a result, a small number of contributors had been omitted from the credits. The team apologised on Twitter and a number of irate comments were tweeted back (none from anyone who’d been omitted). Sure, I was disappointed not to have heard my name, but given the enormity of the task the Newsjack team have to achieve, to get through all the submissions and produce a show in about 48 hours, I can not only understand how it happened, I’m surprised it doesn’t happen more frequently.

I’d noted that my joke had had six words removed. (If you’re interested, my version started, “The residents of the town of Coleshill in North Warwickshire have been revealed by the Sunday Times as having the highest rate…”; if your not, skip this bit in brackets.) I took a note from this to work harder at making my jokes more succinct, maybe it would improve my chances of success.

Having actually got something on the show, I was now a lot more enthusiastic, and a lot more optimistic, as I tackled the task of extracting humour from the week’s news for the next deadline. On Thursday, I kept refreshing my in box, expecting the Newsjack email to appear. It didn’t arrive. I listened to the show that night, just in case there’d been a problem in sending the emails out, but no, I hadn’t succeeded.

The next week, I had to go out that Thursday night, and left leaving the house as late as possible to see if I’d got ‘the’ email. At 6:45pm I had to accept I had failed again to make the show. Maybe, I thought, my success had been a one off, never to be repeated.

It wasn’t till the following morning I discovered that I had got an email and had got this one liner on the show….

“New research has found that companies who employ a significant number of women bosses perform better than those dominated by men – mainly because the companies spend less on salaries.”

This time, it was exactly as I’d written it and my name was read out in the credits. For the next three weeks, every spare moment was spent scouring the papers for stories I could make a joke from. I also managed to get tickets to see episodes five and six being recorded. I was in the audience, fingers crossed, wondering if the next joke or sketch would be mine. Both times I would make the long train journey home, from London to Leamington Spa, disappointed.

For series ten I set myself a goal to get at least three one liners or one sketch in the series.

The deadline for sketches is midday Monday. This gives writers who don’t have to work on Monday mornings an advantage over those of us who do. We have to finish off our sketches on Sunday night, or in the early hours of Monday morning. The deadline for one-liners is midday Tuesday, so on Monday nights I would be agonising over which of my precious one-liners to send in. Back then, in the good old days, the limit was as many one-liners you could fit on a page.

Deciding which one-liners to send is a form of self-inflicted, psychological torture. I’d ask friends to rate my jokes but, once I got the results back, I’d often be looking at choosing between jokes that had been rated averagely by all the panel or jokes rated highly by some but totally disliked by others. And if only it were as simple as being funny and topical! If two writers send in the same joke, the production team discard it, so you need to consider how likely it is that another writer will send in the same joke. This is what I call ‘The Newsjack Dilemma.’ I can’t be the only Newsjack writer who’s heard a one liner on the show that matched one I’d discarded, the irony being if I had sent it in, neither I nor the other writer would have got it on the show.

One problem with writing for the show is that I found myself becoming very critical of jokes that did make it into the show, especially in the weeks when I’d not had anything accepted, i.e. most weeks. There’s bound to be at least one joke that will make me think, ‘they picked that over one of my mine!’ But there is no definitive measurement of how funny a joke is. It’s a personal thing that varies from person to person.

The inverse of this, however, is when I hear a joke that I think is much better than the one I sent in on a particular topic. Jimmy Carr says you don’t make jokes, you discover them. It’s like trying to solve a puzzle and when I hear a better solution than one I thought of, I really enjoy and appreciate the writer’s wit- whilst kicking myself for not finding the joke for myself.

After five episodes of season ten had aired without a single credit, my confidence had taken a blow, my goal was unreachable and I was desperate to get something, anything, on. A new production team had taken over the show and I’d convinced myself that my sense of humour was incompatible with theirs. I’d noticed, indeed it had irritated me, that the new team were often picking jokes that were not topical so, for my last page of one liners for that series, I included jokes that were not so closely linked to that week’s news and it worked…

“The farmer, who erected solar panels so large they blocked out the sun, has been arrested on a charge of daylight robbery.”

A few weeks before series eleven started, an email was sent out to all the writers who’d had something accepted in the previous series inviting us to a meeting held in a pub’s basement near Broadcasting House. As far as I know, this was a one off event. Never repeated, possibly because there were complaints made that it was unfair to writers not in a commutable distance to London. I enjoyed the evening but there wasn’t much information to be gleaned that wasn’t available on the web site. I wish I’d had time to stay afterwards and socialise with the other writers, but I had to catch my train. I did manage to speak to a couple of writers just before it started. They’d both had sketches accepted and both had commented that their sketches had been changed quite a lot by a script editor before being recorded. Another thing that came out was that the producers, Charlie Perkins and Arnab Chanda (who appeared to me to be the youngest in the room), had been told that series ten, their first, was not topical enough and they’d be looking to rectify this. So my new tactic to send in non-topical jokes was unlikely to work again.

I went into series eleven with a renewed feeling of optimism, but, like series ten, after five episodes I had not achieved a credit. It was late on Monday 27th October. I needed to go to bed but I was one one liner short of the limit I could send in. I didn’t want to waste that spot when I found a newly posted story on the internet that inspired this joke…

“Claims that listening to Bohemian Rhapsody can cure illness have been confirmed by doctors after they managed to cure one poor boy, from a poor family…”

On paper, I didn’t think it was a great joke, so I was really surprised that, not only did it get on the show, but also that it got a huge laugh from the audience.

I didn’t get anything in the next series. Over time, it’s got tougher to get things on the show. Not only had he number of submissions gone up but, because the team were receiving so much material, the number of one liners you could submit had dropped from as many you could fit on one page, to nine, (six breaking news and three TV listings), and then to six (three breaking news and three Viewsjacks).

Another possible reason (excuse?) I came up with for my lack of success was a change in the format of the show where the first eight minutes of the show is taken up by an introduction, normally about a topic that has occurred in the news after the submission deadline. I can see why they did this, it makes the show more topical. With this format the show did win the Rose d’Or Best Radio Comedy Award for 2015, but it does mean less submitted material makes it into the show. I had assumed they had cut the number of one liners they used but when I compared an episode I’d kept from 2013 to one in 2016, the number of one liners were about the same (the 2016 episode had 20 one liners compared to 21) but the number of sketches had dropped dramatically, from 17 to eight.

So having come up with some excuses, I was very pleased to achieve two credits in series thirteen. The first one was my first Viewsjack item, where you have submit lines where a member of the public voices an opinion …

“[SECRETIVE] I am really worried that Ashley Madison will find out I’m using another infidelity dating website.”

And once again I managed to get a News item in the last episode of the series…

“As part of a cull on big brand names, Tesco’s have stopped stocking Carlsberg lager. A statement from Carlsberg said it was unable to comment, but if Carlsberg could comment, it would probably be the rudest comment you’d ever heard.”

For series fourteen, the most recent as I write this, I failed to get any credits. Of course, I’ve come up with an excuse. Despite my efforts to the contrary, the rehearsals and recording of my Rhyming Detective Podcast (which I had to write, organise and perform in) clashed with this series air dates. As a result, I only sent in five sketches over the whole series and rarely achieved getting six one liners, never mind having a list to pick from.

So I’ve managed to get six credits on Newsjack, all for one liners. No success on sketches for Newsjack yet although I did get an email back for one of four sketches I sent to Newsjack’s sister show ‘The Show What You Wrote’ in 2016. This is a Radio 4 Extra show that consists of four episodes a series and does not appear to have a fixed slot in the schedules. In the email they said…

“This is just to let you know that something what you wrote is very good, and we’ve put it under consideration for the recordings. We don’t think there’s any more work that needs to be done on it, so you don’t need to do anything else for now … It might *not* get recorded – we’ve asked for rewrites on a lot of things, and obviously we want to be picking from a larger pile of sketches than we can use – but I’d say at this stage it stands a very good chance.”

IMG_0028Alas, my sketch didn’t make the final recording, but I’m glad I managed to get to the first recording session in Manchester and see my sketch being recorded (as well as seeing Jason Mansford live). Had I not gone, I wouldn’t have known that my elderly, male executive character had been recast as a young woman and the young, female producer had been recast as an older woman. The sketch started well, got some good laughs but then, probably not helped by a fluff which resulted in the sketch being restarted, the end of the sketch failed to get any laughs. However, to quote from the very nice letter from the BBC informing me it hadn’t made the final edit, “You wrote one of the 80 best sketches we read out of about 2,500”.

So maybe next series I’ll finally get a sketch in Newsjack. Maybe then, my addiction will be cured and I won’t feel the need to send something in for every episode. Of course, when I say I’m addicted, actually I could give up whenever I wanted to. I could. Honest, I could.

Simon Paul Miller is the creator of The Rhyming Detective podcast.

If you like this article check out another of Simon’s posts on getting an audience for a live event.